P-90X

Consider this some sort of PSA:

BBBBBBBEEEEEEIIIIIITTTTTTCCCCCCHHHHHHH

-Fin




So, I'm eating my breakfast....well, my sister says I actually drink my breakfast. She has a point. I do Oatmeal for breakfast and I make it with extra water so I can gulp it on down easy. (Shit, I went though a period where I put enough water in it to be able to drink it with a straw.....and I did drink it with a straw, which my sister deemed "Gross") Anyway....if i was on a boat I'd be eating oatmeal ON A MUTHAFUGGIN BOAT.

Ok, that P-90x shit. Supposed to work based on that muscle confusion principle. That shit is a very valid principle. I mean, it really is. So, I'm gonna be traveling a lot and the P-90x program has been seeming quite interesting, inviting,......tempting even (if you don't like my gratuitous use of commas, BLOW ME) , so I decided to start checking it out, getting my research on. Sssoooooo, I find out that shit is an everyday program......EVERY FUCKING DAY type program. On top of the everyday shit, it's like twice a day part of the fuckin' time.

Every fuckin' day, sometimes twice a day, for 90 fuckin days? Lets see 90/7 = like, damn near 13 weeks = like 3 and a quarter fuckin months.

Fuckin bananas.

Oh, and the workouts are around 45-60 minutes long

Not saying the shit doesn't work, or that it is super calo crazy, but at an hour a day, sometimes twice a day I don't give a fuck what you fuckin' do, you will lose wieght and get in in better shape.

Here is a list of shit that it you do it for 1-2 hours a day for 3.25 months straight will get you in shape:
1) Walking around the neighbor hood
2) Fuckin'
3) Vigorously masterbating while watching people fugg
4) Swimming
5) Painting a fuggin house
6) J-settin'
7) Vogueing down the toilet papaer Aisl in Walmart
8) Talking tough and doing tough things
9) Doing hoodrat things

And that is just a short list.


Point I am trying to make is that if you have the dedication and motivation to do shit just do it, don't pay some ass that has prolly been lipoed and roided out and shit $120 bucks just to do what he did. Just be dedicated and do shit.

Now, if you are wondering if I still am thinking about ordering that shit....well, yes, i am. But I'm not gonna do it until after I hae spent 13 weeks doing the following:
1) Fuggin
2) Vigorously Masterbating while watching people fugg
3) Hoodrat things
4) Talking tough and doing tough things
5) Painting a fuggin' house
6) Puttin' niggas in my Kufi category

-the BULLY

I'm back for now.

Soooooo, yeah, your boy has been extra ghost for a lil over a month.

BLOW ME!!

I been doing shit, not doing shit, waiting to hear back on shit, not hearing back from shit, putting up with shit, getting rid of shit, been a lil shitty, been treated a lil shitty and all that there like that there. In the end….I’m still me and I still say “Fuck all that shit!”

So…I guess I’ll begin updating y’all with the female situation.

Me and the Amazon are still kickin it hard as hell……….HHHAAAAAAaaaaaa!!! PSYCH, niggas…PSYCH YO’ MIND, MAKE YO’ BOOTY SHINE!!

What had happened was she had some issues with her apartment. Water leaked into her joint from the apt above and shit got to smelling all musty and moldy and shit. Not to healthy/safe….especially since she has a 5 month old. She decided to get outta there and crash with a friend for a bit (She was already supposed to be moving into another apt in a 1.5 weeks anyway). Here is how that went down.

Ring Ring
BULLY: Hello
Amazon: Hey….blah blah, My friends roommate just came home with a dog and I think my baby is allergic to dogs…
BULLY: What the fuck???? So Your girl just showed up and saw her room mate with a dog in the joint?
Amazon: Yeah…blah blah blah
BULLY (I thought the shit sounded kinda fucked up, but she was upset and had the baby and all that. I didn’t want to make things worse/upset her anymore with my interrogating soooo..): That’s fucked up. Just come up here. Come stay with me.

Now, I am 27.5 years old. Never had a room mate. Only people I have ever shared a house with for more than five days was Moms and my sis. This shit wasn’t gonna be easy , but I wanted to help her out…..yeah, so I’m bitch like that.

Sooooo, she’s staying with me. Now, BULLY as I am, I still believe in respecting people’s homes and all that and showing tremendous amounts of gratitude when they let you stay there…and especially when they are helping you out. Like, if I come to stay at your place for 3 or more days I’m gonna hit the grocery store for you. Replace the bottle of juice that I killed. Maybe cook you some dinner and shit. When I leave I pretty much like shit to be about where it was before I came, if not better. Amazon….. not so much.

Don’t get me wrong, she did do some things, and I did appreciate it very much. She made my bed everyday, did my laundry and folded it up, she wiped down my kitchen counter top once or twice and loaded my dishwasher once or so. She cooked once and bought me dinner twice. That shit was real nice.

But, looking at the whole picture it wasn’t even. 10-11 days and I was provided for 3 meals (Guess who provided US with meals the rest of the time. And the one time that she cooked she packed the leftovers for her lunch the next day. Didn’t even offer it to a nig). She did my laundry, but she ran my washer and dryer a ton. While she was there my shit didn’t go 2 days with out running. And yes, the vast VAST majority of the shit getting washed and dried was hers and her baby’s. She was even using the hot water and shit.


Eventually I had to start asking her to get shit. I asked her to bring home some paper towels and a case of bottled water. The next day she wanted food from this restaurant that she was fiending for and said she was gonna get that for dinner. I said “cool”. She gets the dinner, she tells me she wants some cookies so I go and get some cookie dough (Yeah, another time where She did something, but got something in return also. It didn’t really work for me like that). We eat, and we are full and happy then she puts on the sweet voice and goes “I forgot to get the bottled water and paper towels today.” (Call me stuck on thinking people are trying to run game, but the way that came across to me was that she thought that since she bought dinner that I wouldn’t worry about having her get the paper towels and stuff)

BULLY: That’s ok……you can get them tomorrow.

Anyway, so that’s how shit was going (I’m not even gonna say nothing about my toaster over that she tried to cook a pop tart in and ended up burning shit the fuck up. Had my joint smelling smokey as hell…and this was after I had been gone to the gym for like an hour and the glass door and window had been open. Toaster oven never got cleaned and she only left it in there for a minute…..Yeah, in a minute that bitch smoked enough to permeate my apt and leave the paint on the top of my toaster oven all fucked up as if there was hot fiyah and flames and shit …yeah, really)

So after her being there for a week and a half I go to help her move into her new apt. It was rainy as hell (Yeah, tropical storm Faye was in that bitch) and I’m helping her pack up the rest of her shit and move. I’m up in her kitchen helping her pack up her shit and why is her motherfuckin Fridge and pantry CHOCKED FULL OF SHIT?
CHOCKED FUCKIN’ FULL.

BULLY: Why didn’t you bring some of this food up to my place
Amazon: It would have been out of my way to come here then go up to your place.

Y’all I went way outta my fucking way to do shit and help this female out. I fuckin let her live with me for a week and a half. Moved her big shit (sofa, love seat and dining room set) into my mom’s garage while she waited on her new place to open up. Y’all, I even burned a half day’s vacation to go down and help her get her shit together so she could get out of the moldy musty ass apartment. A halfday. I’m a fuckin’ engineer. I get payed pretty fuckin well. A half a fuckin day is waaaayyyyy more than fuckin $60. But this chick couldn’t take an extra 40 minutes outta her day to bring some food to feed her and the guy nice enough to let her and her 5 month old stay with him so that they didn’t have to stay in a moldy musty ass apartment.

So, yeah, I told her how I felt like I went outta my way to do stuff for her and felt like I wasn’t getting it back. She told me that I wasn’t being fair because she has a kid and has to work a second job and she is tired at the end of the day.

Yeah, she pretty much told me that since she has to do more I have to settle for less.

YYYYyyyeeeeaaahhhhh, ok. Well. Whatever. I did someone some good deeds and shit. Ok. I finished helping her move (put in a total of about 7-8 hours) then went and got her food from Burger King when I was done. And as far as relationship shit went I was done. I still wanted to be friends and kick it with her some, but there wasn’t anyway I could see me being with someone that has such different views on something like that. I’m a very generous, appreciative type person, but I like to get it back. I’ll understand if there is shit that you can’t do, but I’m not down with shit when you just won’t do cause it isn’t easy for you.

Anyway….the next weekend I’m out at a cookout that she invited me to. It was at her friend’s place. The same friend that had the room mate that just up and came home with a dog. Now by now, as told by the Amazon, the room mate had gotten rid of the dog because she realized that she would not have the time for it…….Yeeeaahhh.

So, I’m there, playing some spades and I ask “So, what did room mate do with the dog?”

Amazon’s friend was like ”…..Dog? What dog? My room mate didn’t ever have a dog. Where did you get that from?”

Yeah…..Amazon had done told me a story and played your boy like a poo-butt.

I blew her out in front of her friends…yeah, cause I’m tacky like that. I later texted with her a bunch to give her a chance to make some since outta shit, but she never came up with a decent story.

She went with :”Oh, well, I really just misunderstood the roommate. She told me she was thinking about getting a dog and then ended up not getting it.”
And shit like : “I did question friend when she said the room mate never had a dog….you just didn’t hear me”

Yeah, she got me. So, now I don’t really see me being friends with her anymore. Moms BULLY damn sure don’t like the chick anymore. Funny thing is….her furniture is still in Mom’s garage.

-the Muthafuckin' BULLY

P.s.:My little chick fetish has kinda kicked back in........Slim Chick #1 is doing quite well nowadays.

Off to a great start

Yeah, so it is early as hizzell on a Saturday Morning (6:55 am). I've been awake for bout an hour. And I feel good.

Why, you ask?

I'll tell you.

My old High School Crush (aka Slim Chick #1) came by. We had some sweet sweet cuddle cuddle action...a nice bangout session...went downtown and watched the end of a parade (we were an hour late cause we were bangin/laying there in post coital bliss all cuddled up). We were seen by my ex (Yeah, Slim Chick has the body that the ex would damn near die for.....really, the ex has a BAD body image problem). I know its kinda petty, but...whatever. She started it. Like a month and a half after we broke up she called me up wanting me to come be her protection cause she started talkin to some dude that turned out to be a little crazy and he started sending her a ton of angry text messages and leaving a ton of derrogative voicemails. Tombout she wants to be friends and shit....I haven't been called since ol dude stopped calling her. Friends my ass.

Anyway...Slim Chick #2 is coming over today to do the festival stuff with me. Whats better than having my ex seeing me with a pretty little slim chick? I'll tell you. Having her see me with 2 pretty little slim chicks.


Holla!!